FICTITIOUS FASHION: The Boy Who Couldn’t Get Enough

Have you ever had a meal where things were just so good that you went to town on it and didn’t even mind if someone else was present? Even if you were on a first date and those manners you so desperately wanted to show just go out the window? 

That’s how breakfast was during this photo shoot. I show up on set and they’ve got pretty much everything a boy could ever ask for. Bacon, ham, pancakes, potatoes, fruit, yogurt, granola, milk, orange juice, apple juice and pastries with different jam and cream fillings. I’m a sucker for a fun pastry and this is where I went to town.

I tried to be as delicate as I could but it was a fail on my part. I treated those pastries like they had insulted my family name and spit on the brand new suede Jimmy Choo sneakers I just got in the mail from MrPorter.com. This attack left my hands sticky sweet and the photographer (whom we’ll just say is a bit of a diva for not really shooting much other than still life’s…) really wanted me on set so that’s what she got: me on set licking my fingers clean.

I don’t think she understood that I was trying to stick it to the man so to speak because she just started snapping away, screaming “Geen-yus. GEEN-YUS!”

It’s really uncomfortable that she insists on speaking in this ridiculous French accent when we all know that she was born and raised in Kalamazoo, Michigan.